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- June 23, 2015 at 3:52 pm #4488695
I thought it was about me but I wasn’t being smarmy or judgemental.June 23, 2015 at 4:50 pm #4488707
@keithj 2272676 wrote:
McGowdog, what’s up?.
Thanks Keith. I was a little put off by your seemingly oversimplified answer. I’ve been doing 10th Steps for 16 years. I’m not waiving that in an egotistical way either. The point being, I was just trying to engage in “conversation” of “what are you doing today?” How’s it going with prayer and meditation? What’s your current experience? What’s working? What’s not?
I feel like I spilled my guts out and gave an honest current testimony to the Power of God. I got put on part time, my mom and dad were told they will work 5 hour days and we all lost our insurance, vacation, 401K bennys, etc., but I was able to walk away from that meeting with relief.
I 10th Stepped it walking in and was frankly glad we weren’t told to pack our stuff and go home. We still have jobs… albeit less pay. Failure isn’t much of an option, as my brother is the owner and my parents are too old to find jobs elsewhere and too poor to retire.
So I paused when agitated or doubtful. I prayed for the right thought or action.
When I saw your post, it seemed like a lecture to “keep it simple” or something.
I’m sorry if I took it the wrong way.
@Rob B 2272723 wrote:
If you have a problem, send me a pm and we can work it out, or better yet put my name in column one. I like you Patrick, I hope you know that.
Thanks Rob. It’s all good. We just found out we had no water today and got paranoid that it was because we hadn’t paid the bill yet. Turned out it was just a temporary stoppage.
I’m just punchy lately. I feel paranoid. I feel like people are attacking AA, attacking people who have guided me and shown me, and they seem to do it with malice. Not you guys! I know we are headed for the same goal and live with the realization that we’re all one. We’re all connected and when I hurt, we all hurt. When you hurt, I hurt.June 23, 2015 at 5:52 pm #4488712
Whoops. Guess it was me. I couldn’t agree more with you on the topic, Dog. I regularly have to remind myself that I’m no longer running the show. It’s amazing how easily I can forget that. And what a difference it makes when I actually follow the directions. Despite my morning ritual of thinking about my day and asking that my motives be divorced from self-seeking, dishonest, or selfish motives, I still get agitated from time to time. And I get doubtful and fearful. When those things happen, I ask God for direction. Nothing more simple or more complex than that.
For the past few months, I’ve really focused on trusting my mental faculties. That means after seeking direction from a higher power, I try not to stay in that uncertainty. I try not to second guess, but rather trust that my thinking is on a higher plane.
So, it kind of is that simple for me. Can’t tell you the number of times a guy I’m working with has called with some crisis, and I tell him he sounds agitated and ask him if he has paused. Hmmmm. Never thought of that.
I appreciate your willingness to communicate.
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