Do I believe?? | 12 Step Meetings and Anonymous Groups

Do I believe??

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    I have been journaling and am finishing Step 2 which I will go over with my sponsor tomorrow. Two issues came up that I am having difficulty wrapping my mind around…

    1) Do I believe that a power greater than myself can restore me to sanity? Absolutely!! Do I believe that I truly want to never drink again…not so sure. You see, my problem here is that my bottom wasn’t a very low bottom (thank God as I know it could have been much worse and very likely will be if I ever resume drinking) and I did not lose as much as others although I did temporarily lose my medical license. And this leads into my 2nd issue..

    2) I continue to have the thought (and I know this is insane and delusional) that once I am abstinent for a long period of time, do the recovery work and resume working as a medical professional, that I will be able to one day drink like a “normal” person again. This thought above all else is very concerning to me and I know is something that I need to get rid of.

    Anyone have experience with similar feelings/thoughts? Any words of wisdom would be much appreciated!! :help



    I’ve never considered it normal to drink a toxin.

    According to the Center for Disease Control,
    22,000 deaths are recorded per year as being alcohol
    induced this is excluding accidents and homicides,
    on top of that number there is another 13,000 people
    who die per year from alcohol related liver diseases.

    Also….CDC…..there is no difference in the type
    of alcohol consumed. They all damage organs
    and brain function….even for non alcoholics.

    Why do you think it is?



    I guess I never considered alcohol as a toxin unless drank in toxic levels…what I was getting at was I continue to have the desire/thought that one day I would be able to enjoy a drink on special occasions like other, non-alcoholic people do every day. Is this possible for some but not for others?? Am I totally out there and suffering from delusional, irrational thoughts and terminal uniqueness??

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