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  • #3744139

    Anonymous

    When I finally went into recovery, step 1 was easy for me. I knew that I, on my own, was completely and totally powerless over my addiction. My question is if you all think that this is always true throughout recovery. Will we always be completely powerless against our addiction?

    I feel like I’m developing some good tools to battle my addiction. And they are working. So, I don’t feel so powerless. I don’t think addiction is something I can ever totally defeat, but I still feel empowered.



    #4839046

    yasmar
    Member

    I am not powerless, but I am sure as hell powerless over alcohol.

    I have nearly 4 years of sobriety, interrupted by several relapses. Each of those relapses taught me that I am still powerless over alcohol. Or as a friend in AA told me once “There is no step that reads ‘and then we regained power over alcohol'”. I think I’ll remember that one.



    #4839048

    Anonymous

    This is an important question. The reason I say that is because steps 2-12 aren’t about 2-12, they are about what I looked at in Step 1. My connection to my first step experience is critical. And quite frankly, it needs to be current. I have always been powerless over alcohol. I’m not one of those guys that drank my way into alcoholism. I was out of control from the very beginning. From my first drink to my last drink and from my last drink to this day. I’m never going to get power over alcohol on my own, EVER. If I lose my connection to that first step experience how it will show up is a decrease in working with others, decrease in the disciplines of 10 and 11, pulling away from a home group and other alcoholics and an increase on self reliance or playing God in my life. Over time I will get increasingly irritable , restless and discontent. At some point my mind will respond to the pain of my existence and say, ” I know what will help that out” “It’ll be different this time” or “It’ll be just this one night” The final thing that will happen when I lose my connection to the first step is I’ll commit the most insane act for a guy like me and I’ll do it stone cold sober….drink. My fist step experience is critical, and will be till they day I die. That’s why I stay available to sponsor a lot of guys. They keep me in the first step!!!!



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