Emotions While Working on Step 8 and 9 | 12 Step Meetings and Anonymous Groups

Emotions While Working on Step 8 and 9

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    I’ve made my list and am starting on amends. I’ve been putting this off, fighting it, questioning ad nauseum where I truly caused harm.

    I’m having a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts that are contributing to a pretty frazzled state of mind for me. I have a lot of guilt, shame, anger, denial, resentment – and I was NOT feeling this way so overwhelmingly until I started my 8th step.

    I know there is a lot of fear around making my amends.

    I am praying for willingness to make these amends and willingness to trust my Higher Power with this process.

    Does anyone relate to feeling this way?



    I felt like the worlds biggest butthead, stumbling back into places I was sure I wasn’t welcome. Most went very well, some were awkward some established a sense of pride I hadn’t known for a long time.



    It helps to be very precise about this process and not jam 8 and 9 together – with the help of the directions in the book…I was only nervous about the first direct ammend I made.

    Make a list
    Become willing
    Make direct ammends

    That “become willing” piece is the only one we don’t have direct control over, but at some point it became more important to make the ammends that it did to worry about my feelings over them.

    Yes, I got wrapped up in the guilt and shame of past harm but the difference was – I had tapped into the power that could make the ammends possible and came to rely on it.

    Good work moving forward.

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