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    Wow glad you posted the whole what would happen if you drink seario! That’s so ME! It helps to see that I’m not unusual – in my drinking and the whole emotional cycle that goes with it.

    I really hope you have a positive experience with AA. I really get a lot out of them and feel bad right now cuz I’m in bed with a migraine missing my womens group tonight. 🙁

    Let us know how it went!



    Thanks, guys. Your support helps so much.

    I call it my “first” meeting – I actually went to about 3 or so about 12 years ago. I don’t even really count them because I wasn’t ready to be there and had walls up the gazoo around me.

    I was nervous. I said my sobriety date was June 15th instead of June 5th – I was thinking 15 days down – on day 16 – quit the 5th – I got myself all worked up!

    Many very nice people there. Many different types of people there, which i loved to see. I listened to their stories. There was a leader. I had the courage to get up and say it was my first meeting and got a coin. But, afterwards, I just kind of bolted. I was very overwhelmed…all of those steps on the wall, etc. I ended up kind of bolting afterward without speaking to anyone. They were saying how newcomers should immediately find a sponsor and I was just not ready to start all of that tonight. That doesn’t mean I’m not committed, I was just scared. I’ll try it again. I’m sure I’ll get some more courage as I go.

    Anyway, it kept me from drinking today/tonight. Tomorrow is another day to fight.



    I wish they wouldn’t push the sponsor thing right away. It took me 3 weeks to get one and that was with going to 4 meetings per week! I just ignored that and took my time to get to know some people. My sponsor is great, I don’t need a lot of hand holding and she respects that. BUT she also knows that if I say I need to talk, I REALLY NEEED TO TALK. Lol

    I bolted the first couple weeks too. I think most people do. 🙂

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