This topic contains 81 replies, has 0 voices, and was last updated by Anonymous 7 years, 11 months ago.
- May 31, 2017 at 4:34 pm #4862561
I thought I was high functioning or managable until I realized I that I looked forward to 5pm. I told myself it helped me get through the second half of my day/job- family responsibilities. It didn’t. Seemed like it did at first, then everyday I found myself trying to keep busy just to avoid drinking before “5pm”. Sure, bills got paid, laundry done, kids taken care of, meals (kind of) made. But, that was not functioning. Then it started to interfere with my day activities. I became anxious anytime something was scheduled for after 5; socials, school functions, picking up kids from after 5 activities and even having to pick up spouse from airport for a flight that landed after 5.
I have a school function tomorrow night at 7 and for the first time, am actually looking forward to it knowing that I won’t have to drink a couple glasses of wine at 5 just to dilude myself into feeling secure.
You’ve already said you can’t manage unless you have that bottle. That is not managing. Seems like you have already made a step….further that step. You have support of this site. Seek treatment, see a dr, throw away the bottle. It took me some time, after admitting I was powerless, before I made the decision to stop drinking and actually did it. I wish I had done it earlier. For me, I know that the longer I held off, the worst it would be. Talk to someone about it daily, write in a journal the reason why, why not, etc. have some good old fashion chats with God or your higher power. It’ll happen but only you can admit that you are an alcoholic, and for me, it was the hardest part.
@EliJane 2856124 wrote:
My life doesn’t feel unmanageable. In fact, it feels very well managed, with the handy help of at least 1.75 liters of vodka a week (keep in mind, I’m a very small woman).
I want to stop, can’t go a day without drinking….but I can’t wrap my brain around the “unmanageable” bit.
Suggestions from anyone who’s been there?
ThanksJune 18, 2017 at 7:17 pm #4862514
Yeah… I hear you. People who really are able to function don’t need the alcohol. From what any outsider can see, my life is picture-perfect: good education, good job, nice house, community involvement. But right now I’m feeling horrible because I am on day one of an attempt at sobriety and eating without drinking alcohol is giving me pain EVERYWHERE. Earlier in the day I fell asleep all of a sudden and woke up because I bit my tongue in my sleep hard enough to draw blood. May be outwardly functioning, but not that free to choose really.
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