New and scared shitless | 12 Step Meetings and Anonymous Groups - Part 6

New and scared shitless



This topic contains 16 replies, has 0 voices, and was last updated by  Anonymous 9 years, 1 month ago.

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  • #4483586

    Anonymous

    Somedaysoon you realize weed has become a problem, and you are trying to do something about it, so be proud of that. Please Please leave the OXYS alone,very bad news and it is just a substitution. I have been an addict for about 28 years, I stopped 10/5/09 and it is hard to stay clean,but I WANT MY LIFE BACK. I was existing not living.:a213:



    #4483588

    Anonymous

    Lady for yourm sake and the children’s sake pack up , leave town and check in to a rehab , your nnew life is waiting , if you can do the footwork jesus will do the rest.



    #4483587

    Anonymous

    I Know You Guys Are Probably Laughing At Me Right Now Saying Pot Isn’t
    A Drug
    ,

    I Have Tried To Stop Many Times Over The Yrs With No Luck All Of My Friends And Family Uses And Sells Which Makes It Hard Then When I Stay Away From Them I Am A Bad Person In There Eyes.

    I Work In An Environment Where They Get High Or Drunk Aty Work Even Thou I Never Let On To My Coworkers That I Have A Problem I Want To Quit Everyone Laughs At Me And Says There No Rehab For That U Just Have To Do It

    I Know I Have Issues with Depression And I Am Sacred To Talk To Anyone I No Because Of Gossip And Judgment

    My Husband Talks Crap about Me and My Addiction To Everyone He Knows And I Hardly Leave The House Now Out Of Embarrassment. I Feel Lost Hopeless And Like A Liar Pretending Everything Is Ok And I Am Screaming Inside.

    Someday, look at those five sentences. They take up most of the paragraph you wrote. They aren’t about your addiction; they are about your fear of being judged. You seem to place a very high value on what other people think of you. And you seem to value the judgment of others more than your own well being. That’s co-dependence. To the max.

    You don’t want to be judged by your family so you keep visiting them and getting stoned in the process, Just so they won’t think you’re a bad person. You don’t want to disclose your use at work for fear that your boozing drug addled co-workers will think less of you.

    You don’t want to seek professional help because of the possible gossip.

    You have given away any power you’ve ever had to people who demonstrate every day that they could care less about your welfare, and you stand to lose your husband, whom you once must have loved, and he you. In fact, you state that you are about to lose everything because of your marijuana addiction. But actually, you are willing to lose everything for fear of being judged.

    That perception kept me drunk for a long time too.

    Pretend for a moment that you had cancer, and everyone in the world was laughing and mocking you right to your face because you had decided to get radiation treatments. Would you decline to get the treatments just so people would stop mocking you? Would you die for their sake? Why is your addiction any less important to you? What are you willing to give up for your sanity?

    Forget about everything else. Get yourself to a 90 day treatment facility as soon as possible. Forget too about the cost; you’ve spent several times the cost of treatment on the kind bud over the past several years. Now you can spend it on something a little more worth while.

    Finally, whenever I become dependent on what others say about me for my own well being and peace of mind, I’m screwed. Because, in doing so I handcuff myself to the thoughts and actions of others and I’m bound to be hurt. (Lack of power).

    And finally again, whenever I become dependent on what I imagine others are saying or thinking about me, for my own well being and peace of mind I’m f**cking crazy. I can’t read Minds! But I can tie myself up in knots with worry, convinced I know what you’re thinking about me, and I’m pretty sure it’s bad. Sound familiar?

    Go reclaim yourself. Not Someday. Now.



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