AA NA CA 12 Step Meetings & Anonymous Support Groups Forums Drug Addiction Narcotics Addiction-12 Step Support NA Step Study NA Step 1 Should I leave my recovering Oxy Addict boyfriend? If not, how can I help?

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  • #3729819

    Anonymous

    I’m just looking for advice. He is 20 years old. So am I. He has worked 3 jobs his entire life & doesn’t really want to work & everytime he gets his hands on money, it is easily all spent towards marijuana, xanax bars, & oxycontin. It hurts me to see him passed out so I have told him he is not allowed at my house messed up anymore. He is an only child & his parents spoiled him as a child & he still has the mentality that he is still a kid & lives under their roof yet is kicked out right now for failing a **** test. I have an almost 3 year old son who I had when I was 17 years old & I want what’s best for both of us. Some of his friends have told me not to give up, that he needs me, that he’s cut down A LOT since we’ve been dating & it’s true, he has. Instead of doing weed, oxy, & xanax everyday all at once, he smokes pot like 3 times a week, does little amounts of xanax like once a week, & does oxycontin like once or twice a month. He says he needs me to quit but everytime he is high, he turns into a big ***** & puts it before me, obviously. I just want him to get help but seeing as he grew up spoiled rotten in a rich neighborhood, he doesn’t think he needs to go to a detox center & refuses. He says he wants to quit but it’s hard because of how good it makes him feel. He’s been to a therapist & they told him he was clinically depressed at one point & had sever anxiety so they put him on xanax when he was 16 & he started abusing it & upped his dose to bars & he went through 60 bars in 5 days back in December 2009. It’s just an on going process of relapses & screw ups. I’m trying to see things from his eyes so I can came here to speak. Thank you for any advice.

    -Ashley



    #4648279

    Anonymous

    Hi Ashley,

    Welcome to 12 Step National Meetings. You may want to consider posting your questions about your relationship in the Friends & Family Forum. I’m sure you’ll have a better chance at getting responses and direction there. This is the NA Step Study/ Step One Forum.



    #4648285

    Anonymous

    All I know FROM EXPERIENCE is that they wont quit unless they’re ready…I once had a boyfriend in almost the same situation who also became my first born’s father that I had to leave because he wasn’t ready to quit…and still isnt 6 years later. I also became an extreme addict after I left him and even after my “intervention” from my family I didnt quit because I wasnt ready. I am now but have lost sooo many important people in my life because of my disease. But it really just depends on if he’s ready or not so sweetie before you have his baby, if not too late, pleasssse figure out if he’s ready or not because it will help out sooo much! I promise!

    Taking it one day at a time,
    Shanell



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