Sponsor says I don't believe I am an alcoholic | 12 Step Meetings and Anonymous Groups - Part 12

Sponsor says I don’t believe I am an alcoholic



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  • #4853078

    Anonymous

    Hi,

    I want to preface this post by saying that I’m not trying to be snarky or picky, I’m trying to understand.

    Whether it is technically step 1 or 3, the giving over of control confuses me. It seems at time to be a total handover, but what about the serenity prayer? “change the things I can” —to what does that refer? How do you have the wisdom to know the difference?

    Obviously I need to do things like pay the bills, shovel the snow off the sidewalk, which are within my control. And also obviously I can’t control whether it snows tomorrow (although, believe me, I’ve tried!). But what about the gray areas?

    It may be that by asking, I”ve revealed infinite layers of ignorance, but I’m interested in how others think about it. It is also possible that perhaps this isn’t an appropriate place to post this question? If so, just let me know.

    Thanks!



    #4853069

    Anonymous

    IMO, we are asking for wisdom (from God) to know the difference between what we can and cannot (or maybe should not attempt to) change. Part of the unmanageability of our lives is that we DON’T know the difference quite often. We waste time and cause harm by trying to control the uncontrollable. So, when we awaken spiritually, one of the things we get from our Higher Power (thanks to our conscious contact) is the wisdom to know the difference between those things requiring effort on our part and those that we cannot control (the outcome of those efforts, other people’s reactions to our efforts, etc.).

    Does that make any sense?



    #4853079

    Anonymous

    Thanks Lexiecat.

    It doesn’t make sense to me at a deep level yet, but I think I get the basics of what you are saying. It seems that the wisdom to know the difference is something that will evolve over time if you work the steps. At least, that is my hope.

    For some of us who have been “successful” in life (whatever that meant) control was our best friend. It kept chaos at bay. Or that was what I thought. Letting some of that go will definitely be a process.

    Again, thanks!



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