CoSex and Love Addicts Anonymous COSLAA is another twelve-step fellowship created to support the family members and friends of sex and love addicts.

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COSLAA is a 12-step program meant to provide support and assistance to those who suffer with compulsive sexual and romantic conduct. The program stresses personal responsibility, accountability, and self-awareness and is based on the principles of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and other 12-step programs. 


Sex and love addiction may cause substantial damage to a person’s physical and mental health, relationships, and quality of life as a whole. It may also have a dramatic effect on people around them, leaving them feeling alone, helpless, and overwhelmed. COSLAA offers a safe and supportive atmosphere in which persons working toward recovery may share their experiences, strength, and hope with one another. 


COSLAA’s 12 stages are similar to those of other 12-step programs, but they are customized to the requirements of persons who suffer with compulsive sexual and romantic conduct. The program promotes people to take responsibility for their own well-being, develop healthy coping methods to handle triggers and stresses, and cultivate meaningful connections with others. 


The first phase of COSLAA is to acknowledge helplessness over sexual and romantic compulsive behaviors. This stage enables people to recognize their inability to regulate their behavior and their need for assistance in order to stop the cycle of addiction. The second step is acknowledging the need for a higher power in the healing process, and the third step is deciding to surrender one’s life to this force. 


The fourth phase is doing a moral inventory, reviewing one’s behavior patterns, and identifying any bad habits that may be contributing to the addiction. The fifth step is to acknowledge one’s shortcomings to oneself, a higher power, and another person. This stage is intended to assist people in letting go of shame and guilt and beginning the healing process. 


The sixth stage is preparing to have these flaws eliminated, while the seventh step entails respectfully requesting that the higher authority remove them. Making a list of all those who have been damaged by the addiction and being willing to make apologies to them is the eighth step. The ninth step is to make direct reparations whenever feasible, unless doing so will do oneself or others damage. 


The eleventh stage is continuing to conduct personal inventory and acknowledging faults without delay. The eleventh step is attempting to strengthen one’s conscious connection with a higher power via prayer, meditation, or other spiritual activities. The twelfth and final phase is spreading the COSLAA message to those who may be battling with compulsive sexual and romantic conduct and using these concepts in all aspects of one’s life. 


COSLAA also stresses the need of finding a sponsor, or a more experienced member who can provide direction and support during the recovery process. As people move through the 12 stages, sponsors may give practical counsel, share their own experiences, and provide accountability. 


One of the distinguishing characteristics of COSLAA is its emphasis on fostering community and connections among its members. Individuals are encouraged to attend frequent gatherings where they may share their experiences and provide one another support. COSLAA also offers tools and assistance to anyone who may be struggling to comprehend and manage their addiction. 


COSLAA is not meant to replace standard medical or psychiatric therapy for addiction or other associated conditions; rather, it is designed to supplement it. Individuals are encouraged to engage with a therapist or other healthcare professional, if necessary, and to seek further help outside of the group. 


Concerns have been made by critics of COSLAA over the program’s ability to perpetuate shame and guilt or encourage people to blame themselves for their addiction. COSLAA, however, stresses personal responsibility and accountability and encourages people to strive toward healing and recovery in a friendly and nonjudgmental atmosphere.